18.

Eighteen is the legal age to:

• Become legally independent from parent guardianship
• Joining the police force
• Buy cigarettes
• Buy/drinking alcohol
• Get a tattoo
• Go clubbing
• Getting married without parental consent
• Making a will

(I think NZ is suggesting something...)

To celebrate my new found independence, I am going to drop out of school and join the police force. Due to catching speeding drivers and not dealing with anything remotely important in our society, not to mention eating doughnuts and drinking hot coffee all day, I will start smoking to relieve all the stress. 

I will start to realise this career path of justice is not for me, and quit to join a gang. I will cover myself in tattoos of completely unrelated and unmeaningful symbols, characters and letters on every part of my body. Facial piercings are cool too, right? Nose studs, lip rings and eyebrow piercings - I might as well get some of those too. My rebellious/mafia/bad girl look will then be complete with the hottest and baddest looking motorbike, filling the streets with the roars from my engine everywhere I go.

Gang shootings? No problem. Being the boss I am, I will come out alive without any scratches on me every single time.

On top of that, I am going to get drunk every night at the club and maybe one day, I will decide to elope with a random guy that I will have known for only five minutes.

Tragically, I will be diagnosed with lung cancer and a liver problem and will only have six months to live. I will start writing my will, which will be everything I have left after spending all my money on drugs and motorbike accessories. 

Lying on my death bed, I will then reminisce of all the good times before I turned 18, and wonder why my life turned out this way.

And then I die.

Yup, this is my new life plan. Happy 18th Birthday to me.